Transitory Psychosis

I’m back, after a long silence in this space. My return is just in time for my annual gripe session about the songs of the season. It’s the Christmas season again and the carols are playing, and playing, and playing, and….

Don’t get me wrong, I love celebrating Christ’s birth. I love gift-giving. I love fun time with family. But I don’t love a lot of Christmas music.

I do enjoy a bit of the old standards: Joy to the World, Silent Night, O Come O Come Emmanuel, etc. I also enjoy hearing these done in a fresh way from time to time: Mannheim Steamroller has some interesting instrumental. I’ve heard Phil Keaggy do a few as well.

I even enjoy a few Christmas novelty songs, in small doses: I’m Gettin’ Nuttin’ for Christmas (heard that the other day for the first time in years), I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas (once or twice is plenty), Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer, I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus, etc.

I even enjoy a few of the more contemporary secular Christmas tunes: Merry Christmas Darling (the Carpenters classic), Tender Tennessee Christmas, etc.

What I DON’T enjoy are the lame Christmas songs and the six weeks of 24-hour nothing-but-Christmas-music-radio-stations. So what are the lame songs (IMO)? Here are some that are grating on me this year.

Christmas Shoes–okay once or twice a few years ago. Enough already. Change the channel immediately.
Little Drummer Boy–drum this one right out of town, for good. Never heard a good version. Never.
Any Christmas song done by an aging rocker or pop star trying to hang on to a career.
Any re-re-re-re-re-re-recording of a Christmas “favorite”–how many versions do we need of Mary Did You Know?
If Only, the uber-lame spoken word song about the guy and the flock of birds–a good story once, not the 1000th time.
Any Christmas song with bad theology (i.e., We Three Kings–the Bible never says there were three or that they were kings.)
Any good Christmas song done poorly–the champ is O Holy Night, a good song, butchered relentlessly.

I’m anything but a Scrooge, believe me. I just grow weary of the same old songs of the season–usually by the Sunday after Thanksgiving. Come on, musicians! Give us some fresh stuff! The old story never gets old and we even like the old songs, to a degree. But I ache for some fresh tunes.

An article in the New York Times the other day got me thinking. This time of year is wonderful and frustrating–characteristics that seem true of life in general. So with the help of a few sources, I’m making a list of some of the frustrating messages I see and hear, especially this time of year. See if any of them sound familiar.

To be continued
Sold out
No longer available
Not at this address
Your email was undeliverable
Can’t take your call, leave me a message
Not in service
Register closed
This may sting/hurt a little
Your call is important to us
Can you hold?
Invalid user name/password
Assembly required
Batteries not included
Try again later
Prices subject to change
Would you like his voice mail?
Word has quit unexpectedly

Can you think of others? Probably so. The good news, of course, is that you’ll never get such messages from God. His line is never busy, he always recognizes you, and is never out of what you need. A comforting thought amid the holiday hustle and bustle.

Struggling with gift ideas for the teens on your list? A study from OTX Research and eCRUSH has answered the age-old question, what do teens want? The answers are not surprising.

When asked what they want most, these were the top four answers:
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Okay, I confess–I don’t like Christmas music. Well, that’s not entirely true. I do like some Christmas music. I know some people just can’t wait for the time when their favorite radio station goes to the all-Christmas-music-all-the-time format, but I’m not one of them.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against Christmas. I love the story of the Christ-child. The birth of Jesus is one of the most amazing events in history. I think His death and resurrection are much more important, but His birth is still worth celebrating. In addition, I’m in favor of anything that gets people talking and thinking about Jesus. Besides, the Christmas celebration is a great opportunity to show love to our families. But do we have to have the Christmas soundtrack?
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Saw a great video this morning from Focus on the Family. It’s a commentary on the trend among retailers to wish us “Happy Holidays” rather than “Merry Christmas.” I think I like the recommendation of wishing them “Merry Tossmas” instead. Check it out here.