Transitory Psychosis

I ran across a sports story yesterday that left me scratching my head. Here’s an excerpt:

Gordano were first to cross the whitewash, with wing Jack Thomas scoring out wide. The home side replied with an unconverted try, but the Sharks responded with a dominant period, with the superb Ben Harvey taking the ball to within yards of the line, No 9 Gavlar Yandell [no relation, by the way] eventually going over.



Playing down the slope, Gordano’s seven-man pack led by skipper Matt Rollings, still had the upper hand, with Harvey and flanker Mike Yandell [again, no relation] prominent.



With confidence high, the Sharks turned down a kick at goal, opting to use their powerful backs to run the ball. This paid dividends, with fly-half Aaron French crashing over.



Soon after Gordano were punished for overcomplicating a move in midfield. A loose pass was collected by the home side, and fluid passing saw the wing score in the corner.

Now, I’m a lifelong sports fan. But reading this story left me confused. What is the world is the “whitewash” and a “sin-bin.” What does a “fly-half” do and how do you “overcomplicate a move in midfield”? A rugby fan could answer all of those questions and move, but I am woefully ignorant of the sport of rugby. The terminology, descriptions, and jargon leave me with more questions than answers.

Near the article’s end, a realization hit me. This is exactly how the unchurched feel when they are confronted with the in-house jargon of Christianity. So often, we are speaking a language they don’t understand.

The further our culture moves away from its historical Christian consensus the more imperative it is that we define and refine our terminology so this marvelous message we bear can be accurately understood.

In truth, it’s hard work to “translate” the gospel into the language of our times. It is much easier to just speak to those who are already on the “inside.” And, in fact, a few (very few) will actually dig in to learn “our” language. But most will do what I’m doing with the rugby story. Smile, shrug my shoulders, and go back to what is familiar. We simply can’t be content to let that happen.

I read with interest an article regarding a Stanford University study on multitasking. (Read it here.) Like most people in my age bracket, I was taught early on to do one thing and complete it before moving on to the next. With the absence of cell phones, the Internet, Facebook, and a lot of other modern information streams that wasn’t too difficult–provided I had the self-discipline to turn off the radio and TV.

Fast forward a few years to the contemporary world. Today we are inundated with non-stop streams of information coming at us from all sides. The old saw about men and television is that men don’t want to know what is on TV, they want to know what else is on TV. In other words, men don’t just sit and watch one thing. They constantly click the remote to other channels (or games) to see if they are missing something that might be better. Of course, I’ve learned that men aren’t the only ones affected by that virus. Women do it too.

The problem is that as information streams multiply, the remote virus seems to spread. We seem to feel an irresistible urge to mentally “change the channel” every so often. We seem to feel a need to know what is going on in the world (Internet), in the lives of our friends (Facebook), and even in the lives of people we haven’t seen in years or wouldn’t pick up the phone to call. In fact, there is even an urge to know what is going on in the lives of people we’ve never even met (Twitter).
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The title of this post is a piece of advice I’ve given to parents on more than one occasion. It’s not original with me, of course, but it has proven to be a good guide for communication of all types.

1. Say it well. I’m not talking about style but rather about being exact. A rule of thumb we’re trying to follow in editorial: If it can be misunderstood or misinterpreted it will be. Be sure you make clear what you mean and what you don’t mean.

2. What they hear is what you said. That’s not to say that people don’t misunderstand. It is to say that what they understood is what they will tell others you said. Be sure that what they hear is what you meant to say. Make it your business to be heard correctly.

3. Before you say it, be sure you mean it. Once said (or read) words cannot be recaptured. Even if you are successful in correcting yourself, the impression made by the original will never be completely forgotten. This is extremely important for parents. A stray word can stick for a lifetime.

4. If you say it, do it. Don’t make promises (or threats) you cannot or will not keep. If you say, “This is the last time . . .” then follow through.

Say what you mean; mean what you say. It’s good advice. Now, if I can just take it . . .

Every family argues. But does it matter how we do it? A study that has spanned three decades says yes. According to an article by Elizabeth Cooney (“A lingering cloud” – read it here), the Simmons Longitudinal Study has followed more than 300 kindergartners into adulthood with some interesting results.

The most recent results, published in March 2009 issue of the Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, indicate that “children exposed to their parents’ verbal battles or involved in family arguments, were more likely to be functioning poorly at age 30 than other people in the study who did not live in increasingly fight-filled homes. The children exposed to family fighting were two to three times more likely to be unemployed, suffer from major depression, or abuse alcohol or other drugs by age 30. They also were more likely to struggle in personal relationships, but that was evident to a lesser degree.”
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I’ve been musing a bit lately about technology. Understand, I’m not a technophile. I try to benefit from it when possible, but I’m not one to go out and buy the latest electronic gadget. I don’t even have Internet access at home. (Not that I’m against it, I just don’t have it.)

Lately, we’ve been looking at TVs. Ours is dying. We’re down to just getting three channels now and no, I don’t have cable, either. (Again, I’m not against it, but when the TV was working well we got 9 or 10 channels without it.) Anyway, the TV search has led to all sorts of considerations. Do I need one with a hard drive? Do I need an iPod dock? (BTW, I don’t have one of those, either.) I’m committed to HD, since everything is going that direction anyway, but how big do I need (32 inches, 44 inches, 63 inches)?
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It’s the Friday before the biggest week of the year for the Free Will Baptist denomination—the meeting of the National Association of FWBs. This year’s convention is in Charleston, WV and will, as usual, include two other national meetings: the National Youth Conference (NYC) and the annual meeting of Women Active for Christ (WAC).
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Here’s a basic rule of communication: What matters is not what you said but what I heard. To put it another way, we haven’t really communicated until the listener has actually heard what we meant for him or her to hear. (The same is true when it comes to the written word.) When the listener (or reader) hears something we didn’t mean, the result can be quite different than what we intended.
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Unchristian, by David Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons (BakerBooks, 2007), is a book I have found to be both eye-opening and assuring. The book examines what young Americans ages 16-29 think about Christianity and why it matters. It is based on research from the Barna Group, of which Kinnaman is president, and it’s eye-opening because the picture isn’t pretty. It is assuring in that in confirms perceptions many of us have had for a long time.

Basically, Unchristian reveals that a large segment of this new generation views Christianity as hypocritical, antihomosexual, sheltered, too political, and judgmental. (There is, of course, far more to know and understand about these perceptions and various nuances to them. The book spends an entire chapter on each.) However, although disturbing at times, Kinnaman explores the reasons behind these perceptions and what we can do about them.
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I read an amazing statistic the other day. According to an article in the Washington Post, (“Our Cells, Ourselves” 2-24-08) there is now one cell phone for every two humans on earth. There are now 3.3 billion active cell phones in a world of 6.6 billion people. That’s staggering.

Who’s on the phone? Just about everyone. Cell phones are popping up in all sorts of places–even in underdeveloped countries. In Africa, cell phone usage has reportedly been growing by close to 50 percent annually. In the U.S. half of all children have cell phones.
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Yes, in case you’re wondering, I’m still around. Unfortunately, I’ve been silent in the blog world for a few days–deadlines and a conference have monopolized my time. The conference finishes up today, so I should get back to a regular blog schedule.

The Christian Leaders and Speakers Seminar (CLASS) I’ve been attending has been interesting. Put on my Florence and Marita Littauer, it has been challenging and informative as we have worked on honing our skills as writers and speakers. If you do either of those and get a chance to attend, do it. It is time well spent.

Having both written and spoken for a number of years, I wondered just how much I could benefit. I have been pleasantly surprised. In addition to the regular sessions, I have enjoyed speaking to our small group twice and will do so once more today. Now get this: these speeches are THREE minutes in length. If you know me, I find it hard to say hello in three minutes, much less convey something worthwhile. The experience has been rewarding.