Transitory Psychosis

I happened across a brief excerpt from musician John Mayer’s recent interview with Playboy magazine. (No, I didn’t see it in the magazine or get it from Playboy. I followed a link from a Christian ministry to get to it.) If you haven’t noticed, Mayer has dated and bragged about bedding some of the leading ladies of pop culture (actresses, singers, etc.) all of whom are very attractive. Oddly enough, none of these relationships has lasted.

WARNING: I’M GOING TO GET A LITTLE FRANK FROM HERE ON OUT, BUT THIS NEEDS TO BE SAID. I’LL BE AS DISCREET AS POSSIBLE.

In the interview, Mayer confesses to a fondness for porn. He states that with the magic of modern communication, he sometimes sees 300 pictures of naked women before he gets out of bed. He also acknowledges that he may be his own best lover.

Mayer recognizes that easy access to pornography has profoundly impacted his generation. He even admits that when he is with a real live woman, he replays his mental library of pornographic images. His conclusion seems to be that his fantasy world is better than any real world experience.

I couldn’t help but be saddened by it all. What Mayer describes is the inevitable destination to which pornography leads. Young men sometimes see porn as an enhancement to their sex lives. In reality, it is an insatiable leech. A little soon grows into a lot. It distorts the mind’s eye, turning every woman into little more than an object of momentary pleasure or disgust. Real women are measured by how they compare to the fantasy women on the page, screen, or in the mind.

It’s not something that can be easily turned off either; even when a man wants to do what is right. As many young men have discovered, marriage does not cure an addiction to pornography. And as many women can testify, no living breathing woman can measure up to the fantasy world of porn. Even after the addiction is broken, its shards work their way to the surface from time to time, bloodying relationships with fresh wounds.

The truth is, guys, if you walk this road it will take you where you don’t want to be. Porn promises to give you all, it just doesn’t tell you how bitter that all can be.

Beware, my young brothers! Proverbs 5 advises men to stay far away from the immoral woman and go nowhere near her house (verse 8). That advice rings true, even if she lives in a magazine, DVD, or website.

Today, I can’t escape this sad thought: What have we done to our kids? My wife works at a local high school. Last year they had over 50 pregnant girls in the school. This week, she met a young friend of another student. The friend was very pregnant. My wife asked, “When is your baby due?” “November,” she replied. She’s 14.

It’s not that teen girls didn’t get pregnant in previous generations. But by all accounts, the numbers today are dramatic increases over those of the past. I can’t help asking, what have we (as a culture) done to our kids?

We’ve told them sex is a right that belongs to everyone, no matter the age or marital status. They believe us and they are paying the price in unwanted pregnancies and rampant STDs. It is a price that affects more than the individual. It affects us all.

We’ve told them love is a fleeting emotion that comes and goes with the surge of our hormones. They believe us and search for it in the arms of one, then another, then another, etc.

What has motivated the lies we’ve propagated? In most cases, money. Sex sells. Sales turn a profit. Children suffer, but that’s collateral damage and we aren’t responsible. So while the cash registers ring, the societal price cost goes up.

The sad truth is that we’re only beginning to see the damage. This is a debt we are going to be paying on longer than we can imagine, even if we were to stop the lies tomorrow. But we’re not stopping. We’re just turning up the volume. Maybe that’s good. It drowns out the tears of our children.

In recent days a unanimous decision by the Iowa Supreme Court has legalized gay marriage in that state. Conservative Iowans are outraged and it is possible the decision will eventually be voided by an amendment to the state constitution. The process for getting such an amendment on the ballot is lengthy, however, requiring any proposed amendment to first pass in the state legislature in two consecutive sessions.

For now, at least, Iowa joins Vermont and Massachusetts as states where gay marriage is legal. (California’s Supreme Court ruled in a similar fashion, but an amendment to the state constitution was passed in November effectively outlawing gay marriage. That amendment is being challenged in court.)

The reaction to the gay marriage issue seems to be rather ho-hum among many Christians. What difference does it make? Does it really matter if we place gay marriage on-par with heterosexual marriage? After all, to oppose gay marriage often results in being portrayed in the press as hateful and bigoted, so why not ignore it and focus on things that are more important? However, Christians (and non-Christians alike) need to understand that this IS a big deal . . . perhaps bigger than you ever imagined.
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At what age should parents have the “sex talk” with their kids? Over the years, I’ve heard a lot of answers to that question. This week I’ve heard of one parent who has scheduled a date for “the talk” with their 13-year-old son. I’ve heard others say it should be no later than 14.

Let me preface my remarks by saying I do not profess to be an expert on this issue, nor do I claim to have done this perfectly with my own kids. However, I do have some experience in dealing with this issue as a parent, pastor, and informal counselor.

That said, if you are waiting for any age that ends with “teen” to talk to your kids about sex, you are too late. In fact, if you are waiting until the double-digit years to bring up the subject, you’re too late. In addition, if you think having the “sex talk” is both the beginning and the end of the discussion of this issue, you’re mistaken.
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If you watched the Academy Awards last Sunday night (2-22-09) you were “treated” to a bit of propaganda. Besides the usual display of material excess and moral regress, there was an unmistakable stamp of approval given to homosexuality—an exercise that has become an annual affair at the Oscars.

Sean Penn won the best actor award for his work in the movie “Milk,” the story of Harvey Milk, a San Francisco city supervisor, the nation’s first openly homosexual individual elected to public office. Milk was killed in 1978 by another supervisor.

Penn took the opportunity to lobby for “gay marriage” and express his disappointment over the California vote approving Proposition 8, defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman and effectively outlawing gay marriage. If voting Penn as best actor didn’t get the message across, the industry audience clearly expressed their agreement with Penn in their enthusiastic applause for his remarks and those of others in the same vein.

As usual, the truth about homosexuality was passed over in favor of the popular rhetoric of the gay lobby. With that in mind, I thought I would do my part to present the other side.

As with any issue of morality, those of us who are followers of Jesus Christ must first be concerned with God’s opinion about the issue. To ascertain His opinion, we look to the Bible, the written Word of God. In spite of the attempts of some to turn Scripture on its head regarding this issue, the biblical truth about homosexuality is pretty clear.

The destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah was a vivid expression of God’s wrath against this sin (Genesis 19:1-25). Later, the Law, given by God to Moses on Mt. Sinai, also took a very clear position. Homosexuality was forbidden. Leviticus 18:22 calls it an “abomination” and two chapters later it pronounces the sentence of death on those who commit it (20:13). Before Israel entered the Promised Land, Moses reiterated that homosexual practice was not to be found among God’s people (Deuteronomy 23:17). Later, godly leaders took strong action against it, with God’s approval (1 Kings 15:11-12; 2 Kings 23:7).

In the New Testament, the argument against homosexuality grows even stronger. While so-called “gay Christians” have often been quick to claim Jesus did not condemn homosexuality, He did indirectly do so. In Mark 10:6-9, Jesus confirmed heterosexuality as God’s design from the beginning of creation. (See also Genesis 1:27; 2:24.) Jesus also listed extramarital sex among the sins that defile a man (Matthew 15:19-20) and acknowledged God’s judgment upon Sodom and Gomorrah (Luke 17:28-29).

The apostle Paul gave us the definitive argument against homosexuality in Romans 1:18-32. The apostle presented homosexuality as the product of a reprobate mind (a mind devoid of God). He presents it as a form of idolatry that exalts the creature over the Creator, dishonors the body, and is contrary to nature. In 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, the Bible clearly places those who practice homosexuality among those who will not inherit the kingdom of God.

To sum it up, the Bible labels homosexuality as sin, an affront to the holy God. Christians must hold to this truth without compromise and we must oppose attempts to further the gay agenda by voting for things like Proposition 8 and supporting other legislation that affirms heterosexual marriage and forbids any other types.

It’s also important, however, that we contend for the truth about sexuality and marriage in a way that both honors God, furthers the gospel, and opens the door to true repentance and salvation in Christ—even for those once trapped in the homosexual lifestyle. That’s what I’ll focus on tomorrow.

Two items have caught my attention in the past couple of days. The first was a statistic from the Gardasil website (www.gardasil.com). As you will probably remember, Gardasil is the new drug said to protect against four types of human papillomavirus (HPV). Two of these types of HPV reportedly cause 70% of cervical cancer and two more types cause 90% of genital warts. All are spread by sexual contact.

The stat that caught my attention is that claim that 80% of women will have had HPV by the time they’re 50.* (For the record, this statistic includes more than 30 genital HPV types, not just the four Gardasil is said to protect against.) For most women the virus will clear on its own, but when it doesn’t, cervical cancer can develop. Because of these stats, the manufacturers are recommending that all girls be given Gardasil as a protective measure.
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Sex is the unspoken word in many homes and churches. Maybe it’s because the subject makes us uncomfortable, or perhaps we don’t talk about it because we’re afraid we’ll stir up inappropriate feelings or activities. Some Christians I’ve met would just as soon the topic never be addressed in their presence. Whatever the reason, I say it’s time we get over it.

In a sense, sex is like the sun–it is. You can close the doors and pull the blinds, but it is still there. Even when you don’t see it, the sun is still there and still shining. In the same way, trying to hide your eyes from sex doesn’t stop it from being. The truth is that sex is part of the human experience. That’s why we simply have to talk about it.
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By now you’ve no doubt heard about the results of an online survey of more than 10,000 teen girls and young women conducted by TyraShow.com, the website of “The Tyra Banks Show.” According to the (self-reported) survey:

On average, girls are losing their virginity at 15 years of age.
14 percent of teens who are having sex say they are doing it at school.
52 percent say they do not use protection when having sex.
24 percent with STDs say they still have unprotected sex.
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Working for a publisher has some real perks—getting to meet a lot of really great people, for instance—but it also has its head-scratching moments. One of the latter came when a self-published booklet recently crossed my desk. Written by Victor T. Cheney, the brief tome is entitled, Celibacy Guaranteed.

Cheney appears to be a Roman Catholic who is proposing a solution to the problem of sexual sin among the clergy—castration. To hear Cheney tell it, castration is the cure for a host of sins and even physical maladies. He postulates that it would save the Catholic church a lot of money as well since they’ve spent so much compensating victims of sexual abuse committed by their priests.
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It’s no surprise to anyone who’s paying attention that television programming has grown more “edgy” in recent years. If, however, you need some empirical evidence, the Parents Television Council (PTC) Report (“Happily Never After”) released on August 5 will provide it.
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